Gay men marry women for a variety of reasons. Some may do so out of fear of being ostracized by the gay community, or because their parents have married heterosexual spouses and believe that this is a good thing. Others do it because they don’t feel that their sexuality fits well with a committed male partner, or they simply can’t find a woman who is compatible with them. Some do it because they have children with their wives and don’t want to break up their families. Finally, some do it because they feel that their wives are a better support system for them than the gay community would be.
Some of these men do not know that they are homosexual until they are married and then realize how unhappy they are with their lives. Others do not know until they have a 'eureka' moment when they read a book or watch a movie and suddenly recognize their attraction to the same sex as other people's. These experiences can be extremely traumatic and can cause the husband to question his entire life.
Regardless of the reason, gay men that are married to women must decide whether or not they are going to exit their marriages for their own happiness. It is also important for those who know gay men that are in these kinds of relationships to support them in their choices. Ultimately, the welfare of society depends on the stability and health of family life and it is immoral for the state to deny benefits such as healthcare and social security to LGBT couples when they could be receiving them from their spouses.