February 1, 2024

How Do I Tell My Mom Im Gay?

No two families are alike so parents’ reactions to their children coming out will vary. But there are a couple things that nearly all gay kids have in common when they tell their parents for the first time.

When you decide to tell your parents, choose a way of doing it that feels most comfortable to you and works best with their lifestyle and preferences. You may want to call them, text them, write them a letter or sit down with them in person. Pick a place and time where you know you won’t be interrupted, and that they can have your full attention.

If you are worried about a violent reaction or homophobic language, it may be a good idea to have supportive friends around when you do the telling. It might also help to establish a safety plan, such as having someone check in on you every few hours or keeping your phone nearby in case you need to run away quickly.

During the conversation, remember that your parents love you. It might be difficult for them to hear that you are gay, but it is important to let them know that your sexuality does not change their love for you.

If your parents think that being gay is just a matter of sex, try to explain to them that the same love, trust, and affection they expected from marriage will still be there — but with a woman or a man of your own choosing.


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